UK:RESISTANCE: IT'S LIKE THEY'RE ACTUALLY ASKING FOR IT

IT'S LIKE THEY'RE ACTUALLY ASKING FOR IT

Some new girl gaming clan mash-up splinter-group side-project thing involving everyone's favourite Frag Doll and some other girl thing we recognise from a million internet forums has sent in a video clip of them wearing sexy gloves and looking at the camera - as if they might be looking at us!

This kind of reverse anticipatory stalking is confusing and has put us on the defensive. Still, we'll power through as it's pictures of girls:

It's Vixen and Siren. It must be confusing being a girl on the internet and keeping track of all the pretend names you have to use to stop men finding you and killing you. They say they're going to tell us what games to play. At least this time it won't just be the UbiSoft back catalogue.

The game we're thinking of playing at the moment is Put The Sausage In That One's Mouth While That One Feels Our Bottom And Says We're Really Nice And Funny. You can see them ACTUALLY WALKING AND TALKING LIKE THEY'RE LOOKING AT YOU here.

AND THERE'S A PROPER GALLERY THEY MADE PROBABLY JUST FOR US BECAUSE THEY SECRETLY THINK WE'RE REALLY COOL:
The proper gallery.

The fantasy scenario we've built up in our heads around the above photo is this: They're both trying to look as sexy as possible to make us like them, and if there's no clear winner we can have both.